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Episodes

When Churches Use The Same Playbook for Sex Abuse And Coronavirus

April 1, 2020

Lies, cover-ups, institutional self protection... it's like deja vu al over again, only this time, it isn's sexual abuse that some churches are mishandling. On today's podcast, I discuss the similarities between how some chu…

Hello, My Name Is Warrior.

March 25, 2020

What's in a name? And more specifically, what's in a name we give ourselves (or earn from others) in the aftermath of trauma? In this episode of Survivor Sanctuary, I share an embarrassing "name" I earned as a child struggli…

Let Me Prey Upon You: An Interview With Sandy Phillips Kirkham

March 19, 2020

On this episode of Survivor Sanctuary, I have the privilege of speaking with Sandy Phillips Kirkham, a survivor of clergy sexual abuse who has written a book about her experience. Sandy's story is heartbreaking, yet hopeful,…

Always (Standing Up for the) Broken: A Chat With Erik Pederson, Part II

March 11, 2020

On today’s episode of Survivor Sanctuary, we finish chatting with our awesome Aussie friend, Erik Pederson. In addition to suffering abuse as a child and young adult, Erik experienced spiritual abuse by leadership of a churc…

Always Broken: A Chat with Erik Pederson

March 4, 2020

Erik Pederson is our guest on today’s episode of Survivor Sanctuary, so fasten your seatbelts! Erik is an Awesome Aussie who podcasts Down Under, and speaks out against sexual abuse on the regular. He’s also hands down the m…

When the Bible is Wielded As A Weapon Against Sexual Abuse Survivors: With Special Guest Joshua Yoder

Feb. 26, 2020

On today’s episode, we have a very special guest: my cousin, Joshua Yoder! Joshua is a minister with a podcast all about the Bible, and on this episode he helps us unravel the truth behind one of the scriptures that gets bla…

Entering the Struggle: The Courage to Face The Pain of Your Past

Feb. 20, 2020

Many of us have been told our whole lives that it is best to leave the past in the past—but what if truly healing from our past requires us to engage it rather than escape it? Today’s episode is for anyone, abuse victim or o…

Love Always Protects: Rachel's Story

Feb. 12, 2020

On today's episode, I have the privilege of sharing the story of one of our Survivor Sanctuary listeners. Rachel began to be sexually abused within the walls of her church as a very vulnerable young woman, and her repeated c…

How to Apologize to Your Sexual Abuser and Other Important Lessons I Learned in Christian College

Feb. 5, 2020

You know how people say your college years are the best of your life? Yeah, those people didn't go to college where I did. A recent podcast featuring Title IX expert Laura Dunn had me all kinds of triggered this past week, a…

How to be a Hero to Survivors of Sexual Abuse (Cape Optional)

Jan. 29, 2020

On today’s episode of Survivor Sanctuary, we’re chatting about loss, legacy, and what it takes to be a hero in the life of a survivor of sexual abuse. Links: Don Blackwell on Twitter --- Send in a voice message: https://an…

What A Sweaty Keanu Reeves Taught Me About Banishing Sexual Abuse “Survivor Guilt”

Jan. 22, 2020

When it comes to feelings of guilt, sexual abuse is the gift that keeps on giving. Just when you think you’ve made progress in letting go of the deep rooted self-blame, a fun *new* guilt emerges. On this episode of Survivor …

Interview with a Whistle-Blower: Meet Nicole Saylor

Jan. 15, 2020

On today’s episode we’re chatting with Nicole Saylor, a whistle-blower in the church and an advocate for the sexually abused. Nicole did not experience sexual abuse herself, and she didn’t seek out an opportunity to blow the…

Survivor Resolutions for 2020

Jan. 1, 2020

It’s a brand new year, and as the rest of the world resolves to eat more kale and do more crossfit, New Years goals may look a little different for survivors of childhood sexual abuse. Today I’m sharing three of my #survivol…

The Best Gift You Can Give Yourself This Christmas

Dec. 18, 2019

Holidays can be rough. For survivors of abuse, they can be brutal. In this episode, find out what each survivor can gift themselves this Christmas to get through the holiday in peace. --- Send in a voice message: https://a…

My Heart Is Broken And So Is My Attachment Style (The Number One Reason I Despise Sexual Abuse)

Dec. 11, 2019

I won't sugar coat this: I am a wreck right now. In fact, I'm more of a wreck than I can remember ever being (and there's been plenty of wreckage, I assure you). In my grieving, I am once again facing the number one reason I…

The Effect of “Look-Back Windows” on Church Sexual Abuse

Dec. 4, 2019

Over the last several years, 15 states have changed laws to extend the statute of limitations on the filing of sexual abuse lawsuits. Eight of those states have implemented “look-back windows” for survivors who were time-bar…

Name that Abuser! (Why Private Repentance is Not Enough)

Nov. 27, 2019

Isn’t it enough that an abuser has repented? Is it *truly* necessary to publicly name perpetrators? The answer really depends on who you ask. But if you ask a survivor of sexual abuse, most of us understand the importance of…

So the Child Molester Says He's Sorry... Now What?

Nov. 20, 2019

Can we take at face value the word of a person who has sexually abused a child? What if he/she claims to be sorry? What if he/she cries? On this episode of Survivor Sanctuary we'll chat about the Church's True Repentance Lie…

When Churches Respond Poorly to Abuse: An Interview with Katie Trout (Part 2)

Nov. 13, 2019

On today's episode of Survivor Sanctuary, we'll hear the second half of my interview with survivor and advocate Katie Trout who shares more of her story of experiencing abuse at the hands of a megachurch staff member. Found …

When Churches Respond Poorly to Abuse: An Interview with Katie Trout (Part 1)

Nov. 6, 2019

On today's episode of Survivor Sanctuary, I'm chatting with survivor and advocate Katie Trout who shares her story of experiencing abuse at the hands of a megachurch staff member. When Katie bravely came forward about the ab…

You Can't Serve God and Insurance Policies (Why the Church Sucks at Responding to Sexual Abuse)

Oct. 30, 2019

What is it about sexual abuse allegations that makes the Church respond so much differently than they do to other crises and tragedies? Matthew 6:24 probably holds the most accurate answer, and in this episode, Kelly unpacks…

A Tale of Two Felonies: How NOT to Handle a Sex Abuse Scandal in the Church

Oct. 23, 2019

On today's podcast I'm sharing a personal experience with a church that dealt publicly with two local crime news stories involving members of their church--one as I was coming into the church, and one when I was walking out.…

Sexual Abuse and the Struggle with Self-Blame

Oct. 16, 2019

Episode 10 of the podcast is inspired by a discussion on the Survivor Sanctuary Facebook Group (you should def join)! Why do so many survivors blame themselves for their abuse? And why is it so hard to combat the self-blame …

Sexual Abuse Is A Big Fat Liar

Oct. 9, 2019

When a person goes through the trauma of sexual abuse, there are negative messages--lies--that can become ingrained in them as a result. One of the universal struggles of sexual abuse survivors is feeling unworthy. Whether w…